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She wanted to write a book that would cause tears of joy and tears of sadness, a book that would change people's lives. Erla-Mari Diedericks. The problem was that I had no idea what to write about. The story just wouldn't come. For years, the frustration built up.

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Where was my story? Be careful what you wish for: I had no idea during those years of mounting writers' frustration that I was busy living the story that would become my book. Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love, once said that there are books you want to write and then there are books you need to write.

While the living of this book almost killed me - and I mean this quite literally: the day I finally decided to leave, my ex-husband's finger marks were imprinted around my neck - the writing of it also drained me at times. Reliving those datk, desperate moments wasn't easy, but I knew that I had to do it, because, somewhete out there, there is someone who is currently immersed in a similar darkness and can't see their way out.

Of course, in the book there is the good stuff as well. I survive. I fall in love. I am still alive. And when someone going through a divorce or heartbreak or an abusive relationship reads this, they will, I hope, see themselves reflected in both my pain and my joy, and this will give them hope I once went to see a fortune teller.

She told me that I would lead an interesting life.

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